Alright, I’ve tried to hold off for as long as possible, but I just can’t stand it anymore! Are you tired of hearing about New Years Resolutions or do you actually need the kick in the pants right about now to continue getting up early with me and my 15 new 6:15am yoga classmates on Tuesday and Thursday mornings? I couldn’t believe it when I had to park 2 blocks away from the gym at 6:00am Tuesday. What did everyone else know that I didn’t? Oh wait… It’s 2010 – the opportunity to start new. And boy do we relish in new beginnings, but how do we actually determine which New Years Resolutions will actually work? The above clip from the Today Show featuring Michelle Obama, provides a great place to start…
I enjoyed dinner at a friends house Sunday night and we reached the topic of implementing new healthy habits. My friend chose to cut all alcohol consumption from his diet. Now, this is a big thing, mind you, he is a wonderful cook and seeing a glass of Pepsi on the rocks next to the stove just doesn’t seem right. But, he made the choice in November to cut alcohol from his diet for 6 months to lose weight and regardless of holiday celebrations and stress, he is doing it!
This life changing goal is powered by 3 key ingredients that make or break any goal:
1. A Pivotal Moment:
My friend experienced in pivotal moment in which he truly felt November was the time that he had celebrated enough over the last 11 months and he would now celebrate in a new way, by losing weight. His weight loss is his new symbol of celebrating.
#1 In Action: I mentioned Yoga… Well, I’ve been “meaning” to start taking yoga classes for well over 4 years now. But I’ve never really had a reason why. Everything else in my world seemed more important than entertaining the idea of going before or after work. BUT last October, I hit my breaking point. I felt like I was going crazy with nervous, stressful, unproductive energy. So I sat myself down and wrote out all of the things that I could do to support myself. I decided that I wanted to join the gym, so I did… Only, after the first day I decided I didn’t really like the gym for the pure purpose of running on a treadmill and using all the fancy equipment. I’m an Oregon girl, I want the smells of the great outdoors, not musty body odor. Nevertheless, I decided I was ready to take a class. I could, after all, make use of my 2 month membership I’d just paid for, right? So I gave myself a week and a goal. I would attend 3 yoga sessions for that first week. I’m not going to lie, it kicked my butt. Yet, I liked it… It allowed me the opportunity to tap into my core desire to listen to my body and truly build strength in a powerful way. 3 months later, I am still at it. Why? It started with a pivotal moment.
2. Replace Instead of Removing:
My friend did not remove the joy of drinking a beverage during a social gathering. Instead, he made sure that he supplied himself with an alternative that would at least to some degree satisfy his need and previous habit of having a drink in his hand.
Replacing one thing with another is important because it guides the mind and the habit to realize that you can still participate in the act and the experience of a cool refreshing drink without the side effects. It tricks the mind into working for you and your goal instead of engaging in the torment and rebellion of not having something. Come on, we all know that the moment someone tells us we can’t have something, we want it all the more… but like, kids, if we can distract the mind with something else, our likelihood for success increases.
#2 In Action:
Last January, inspired to a clean fresh start. Now, I’m not a big drinker, but I wanted to consciously choose my experiences and habits, so I challenged myself and successfully completed an alcohol free January 2009. Warning: If you take this on, you’ll be asked to go to more social gatherings than you thought possible and have every reason to grab a drink. Additionally, you’ll have people, friends who totally support you, say “It’s just a sip! Come on, this is a big occasion, just one glass.” And yet, simultaneously, you’ll influence every one of those people who observes your conscious decision making. During the course of my alcohol-free month, I shared my goal with at least 50 people and of those 50, 5 shared with me that they ended up observing their own alcohol-free months. Of the remaining 45, another 5 said that they decreased their alcohol consumption after being inspired to become aware of their habits, how they wanted to connect socially, and how they felt. That’s 20%! You have the power to empower yourself and significantly inspire others through your conscious and healthy life choices.
Remember: We cannot take something away and not expect something else to fill it, so in creating healthy habits, its important to consciously replace it with something we want otherwise we either break the habit because we’ve deprived ourselves of all enjoy in the experience, or we end up in a whole other habit we hadn’t planned on.
3. Define Why You Want The Goal:
So many of us start with such gumption and determination to achieve our goals and yet we’ve forgotten the core of all human motivation… Why? When the going gets tough, what’s the first thing we ask ourselves? … Why. When we create a goal we should be asking ourselves the same question. Do you know why you are engaged in at least one of your conscious and deliberate goals/habits? If not, I suggest you stop and take note right now for the safe of your goal. Asking why roots our goals in something greater than circumstance. It creates a new mental shift, a whole new thought pattern that supports us when life circumstances and temptations get in the way of our goals.
#3 In Action: A few years ago I found myself at the computer with a glass of soda pop no matter what time it was, I had soda with me. The habit started a few months after a major throat surgery and I convinced myself it just made me feel better, the fizzing and the bubbly goodness actually made me feel like I was healing faster. With a belief like that, of course I continued with the habit! Except, this was 4 years later and I still was convinced it somehow helped. I’ll be blunt, it didn’t. So I decided to try something, since I seemed only to want pop while at the computer, I replaced it with a glass of ice water instead. I still got the ice cubes that I love, but I didn’t have the soda. Guess what? It turns out that I actually enjoyed the habit of having something refreshing to drink while at the computer and once I decided that it was now healthy for me to drink water, I found myself rooted firmly in visualizing all the wonders this fresh water was doing to cleanse and nourish my body. To this day, I rarely drink soda. It’s a treat that I enjoy, not a habit.
Lastly, though not part of the 3 keys, partner up with someone who has a similar goal to share your reasons and your motivation. An accountability partner is a huge asset if you’re the type that thrives on the team. Plus, the thought of letting someone else down is a great motivator.
I am not going to say it again, for goodness sake, pick a goal you actually WANT! Who in the world wants to live out the goal of someone else? Certainly not I.
So, when you create your goals, get real, ask yourself:
- Is this something I want?
- Is it something someone else thinks I should do?
- Or something I think I should do, but don’t actually want to?
If you answered yes to the first question, and no to the rest, you’re on the right track. The New Years Resolutions have their blessings and curses. It’s delightful to begin again. The energy and excitement of new beginnings, visions, and opportunities quite frankly rocks my world. What doesn’t rock quite so much is the fact that so many of us jump on the resolution bandwagon, “Because everyone else is doing it” or because you think you “shoouuuld” and 3 weeks later, my front parking spot at the gym opens up.
Start strong deeply rooted in what YOU want and why. With a dream team like that, you’re unstoppable!
Cheers! To All The Success You Can Handle… And Then Some!
Lacy
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